6 simple ways to get the spark back with your partner

Disclaimer: This post was written for The Growing Up Guide


If you’ve been in a relationship for a while, you know how it is. You both gain a bit of weight, become way too comfortable with each other and date nights are a rare occurrence and are swapped for nights in, comfy clothes and feeding each other pizza until you’re both in food comas.

I don’t know about you, but I actually love this part of the relationship. There’s nothing better than being yourself around someone and knowing that they adore you for it.

Don’t get me wrong, the beginning of a relationship is SO exciting. The constant texting, the wondering when you will next see each other and the romantic date nights that set the perfect scene to fall in love.

Starting a relationship is a seriously special thing and it’s a big commitment. You practically have to think about someone else as well as yourself and for a lot of people, that’s a difficult thing to do!

I don’t have to be crude, we all know what it’s like at the beginning of a relationship. You can’t keep your hands off each other, you miss them all the time and you’re never bored of their company but after a while, sometimes you just want an evening to yourself to read your book or to wear a face mask and pamper yourself a bit.

It’s totally normal to feel this way. In fact, I personally feel like it’s unhealthy to spend ALL of your time with your partner, you must make time for your friends and family too because they’re still incredibly important people to have in your life.

I hear a lot of people my age complaining that the “spark” has gone in their relationship and that sex is a distant memory and their sex drive is non-existent.

A lot of young couples get concerned about this and panic that they don’t want to feel like a “married couple.” From personal experience, sometimes the spark just fizzles out for a while.

The excitement settles for a while because this relationship has become your daily routine – it’s normal.

But you CAN get the spark back! Don’t break up with your partner because you feel like you can’t get the chemistry back because you 100% can.

And here’s how…

Book a night away

Even if you just go to a nice hotel that’s local to you, it’s refreshing to escape even if it is just for one night and it’s amazing how much it can help you and your partner just to be away from your busy day-to-day lives for 24 hours.


Show small signs of affection

Hold their hand and kiss their cheek. I’m not saying you’ve got to grab them and snog them in public. Just make them feel loved by showing little signs of affection throughout the day. I promise it won’t go unnoticed.

Hug more

Hugging is SO underrated. For me, there’s nothing better than a big cuddle after a long day at work. There is absolutely nothing a hug can’t fix.

Give your partner a big squeeze every day! Even if they moan and tell you to get off… They don’t mean it.

Be adventurous

Don’t lie in bed all day. Don’t watch TV all day. Go outside, be active and do something different! Shake up your daily routine a bit and have fun!

Be a flirt

It might feel strange to flirt with your partner depending on your relationship but flirting isn’t just for the dating stage! You don’t forget how to flirt just because you’re in a relationship.

Dust off your old chat up lines and have a giggle with your partner. It’s such an easy way to re-light the spark!

Say “I love you” more

It is SO easy to forget to tell your partner you love them and how much you love them. But honestly, those three words go a long way and they mean the absolute world to hear, especially if you’ve had a bad day.

Tell them you love them ALL THE TIME, even if they don’t say it back every single time… They still love hearing it!

Go on dates, cuddle each other, kiss each other, be romantic! Get that spark back, don’t give up. Love is a very precious thing and you wouldn’t want to lose your relationship just because you didn’t put the effort in to make things great again!


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